WOW ~ Word of the Week ~ Rum Chant

When you’ve started back teaching school, your kid has all four wisdom teeth taken out, and a hurricane comes to visit despite the fact that you live 350 from the Gulf of Mexico…. all in one week. Yeah.

When you have one of those weeks, you get punchy and listen to music and write alternate lyrics. And then use them for a blog post.

I’m so, so sorry.

Rum Chant

A song.

It’s a Regency debutante and the rules of Society to which she must abide meets Lady Gaga song from the 21st Century. Plus a cold orthodontist waiting room. And too little sleep. Way too little sleep.

Again, my sincerest apologies. You should really leave now.

I present, Proper Face, sung to the music of Poker Face by Lady Gaga.

Mum-mum-mum-mah
Mum-mum-mum-mah
Mum-mum-mum-mah
Mum-mum-mum-mah
Mum-mum-mum-mah

I want it to be like when we’re waltzing, please
Touch him, let him, breathe him, stare at him stare at me (I love it)
Love games despite chaperones try to make me play my part
I flirt and banter to tempt my way to his heart

Oh, oh, oh, oh, ohhhh, oh-oh-e-oh-oh-oh
I’ll get him hooked, show him my best looks
Oh, oh, oh, oh, ohhhh, oh-oh-e-oh-oh-oh,
I’ll get him hot, show him what I’ve got

Can’t read my, can’t read my
No they can’t read my proper face
(she’s not Lady Anyody)
Can’t read my, can’t read my
No they can’t read past my proper face
(she’s not Lady Anybody)

P-p-p-proper face, p-p-proper face
(Mum-mum-mum-mah)
P-p-p-proper face, p-p-proper face
(Mum-mum-mum-mah)

I want to marry him a love match we will be
A little naughtiness is fun when you’re with me (I love it)
Behind my mask I hide a wealth of mystery
Only for you to see and not Society (just you and me)

Oh, oh, oh, oh, ohhhh, oh-oh-e-oh-oh-oh
I’ll get him hooked, show him my best looks
Oh, oh, oh, oh, ohhhh, oh-oh-e-oh-oh-oh,
I’ll get him hot, show him what I’ve got

Can’t read my, can’t read my
No they can’t read my proper face
(she’s not Lady Anybody)
Can’t read my, can’t read my
No they can’t read past my proper face
(she’s not Lady Anybody)

P-p-p-proper face, p-p-proper face
(Mum mum mum mah)
P-p-p-proper face, p-p-proper face
(Mum mum mum mah)

I won’t tell you that I love you
Kiss or hug you
Cause I’m waiting, anticipating
I’m not lying, I’m just baiting with my love-game-creating
Unlike the match-making mamas
Pushing awful daughters on you
I promise this, promise this
What you see’s not even the best bit

Can’t read my, can’t read my
No they can’t read my proper face
(she’s not Lady Anybody)
Can’t read my, can’t read my
No they can’t read past my proper face
(she’s not Lady Anybody)

Can’t read my, can’t read my
No they can’t read my proper face
(she’s not Lady Anybody)
Can’t read my, can’t read my
No they can’t read past my proper face
(she’s not Lady Anybody)

Can’t read my, can’t read my
No they can’t read my proper face
(she’s not Lady Anybody)
Can’t read my, can’t read my
No they can’t read past my proper face
(she’s not Lady Anybody)

P-p-p-proper face, p-p-proper face
P-p-p-proper face, p-p-proper face
(she’s not Lady Anybody)

P-p-p-proper face, p-p-proper face
P-p-p-proper face, p-p-proper face
P-p-p-proper face, p-p-proper face
P-p-p-proper face, p-p-proper face

 

Slang term taken from the 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue.

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